Thursday, June 14, 2007

Alotta Lotto



Hello children! Comfy? Cozy? After a short vacation on Rikers Island, I'm back to blogging. My topic today is the Lottery. More specifically, The millions of numbskulls who stand in line daily buying as many tickets as they can in the hopes of striking it rich. My problem is two fold. First, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO WIN! EVER! Stop wasting your child's Similac money on 20 lottery tickets that will never get you anything more than self esteem problems. Dammit people. 2) BUY ONE TICKET! I swear, there is nothing more annoying than standing behind some fruit cup, yelling out all of his/her favorite numbers; a child's birthday, their home address, the lucky numbers from a fortune cookie, your baby mama's fahvuh's prison number..whatever...it AIN'T gonna happen, mate. Just like everything you do: beeg show, no resoolts. So please, step aside and let me pay for my bottle of water. Hay-Zeus Chris Toe! And why is that when just as these people turn to leave, they ALWAYS have to buy just ONE more ticket? It never fails. enough already. Big Ups to Sally Struthers.

2 comments:

jipperbunnyrabbit said...

the lottery is taxes for stupid people. let them be lest all of us smart people's taxes go up.

does this apply to Scratch tickets?

Jane said...

All in moderation, I say.